Easter 5 - Not Quite How It Goes

The Gospel for the 5th Sunday of Easter is John 16:5-15.  This is not quite how it goes.

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And Jesus said, "Listen, I am tired of all this whining about how I am going away.  You know why I am going away - because you people are so whiney and needy.  I'm sick of you.  You know what?  You blew it.  I was going to hang out here and have a 1000 year reign from Jerusalem, but now we will go to plan B.  I'll send you the Spirit... and that will be okay, but I'm going to vacation far far away and won't be with you anymore.

"But what will this Spirit do?  The Spirit will tell you a bunch of things that hadn't been written down, and will let you make up new things so that you can adapt to the environment and culture.  Because man, since I'm not here to run things, the world will be crazy.  So the Spirit will let you tell people that the old fashioned things about sin don't apply anymore, and the Spirit will tell you how you guys are all so awesome and tolerant, and the Spirit will tell you how to judge the old fashioned people who don't want to grow.

"I really don't have anything more to say to you, because, well, I just don't care. I mean, I'm outta here - you guys are on your own.  But here's what you can do - just come up with your own crazy ideas, or recycle business ideas - and then you can say that they are 'Spirit-filled' and expect people to do whatever you say.  Because you get whatever you scrap and claw for - that's how you are going to be great in that Me-less kingdom to come."

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Wait, that's not quite how it goes.